we ended

"It feels miserable with him, but it feels even more miserable without."

It was hard for me to put all these feelings into words. I didn't know how to start or where to go. I thought i needed to put all of these down and i need to move on.

It's scary how things can change in days, hours, or minutes. 

When

"I won't let you go even if you wanted to leave"

Turns into

"Im sorry for making empty promises, at that point i was full of hope."

"Thanks for letting me into your life!"

Turns into

"Im the reason for your pain."

And

"Happy monthsary, thanks for everything!"

Turns into

"Thanks for everything, you're the best that i had."

"Do you miss him or do you miss the way he made you feel?"

                                                                                   

Teach me. 

teach me how to forget somebody who gave you so much to remember. 

Someone who you spent most of your time on. 

Someone who you thought you'd spent the rest of your life with. 

You'll lose yourself a little when you've given in your all and it still wasn't good enough. 

And often you ask yourself

"Am I not good enough?"

Did I do something wrong?

Am I not worth your pride?

Have I not given enough freedom?

Am I not open minded enough for this relationship to go on?

                                                                                               

I'll never forget the times that we had, the good and bad. 

The effort you've put in for me, for this relationship.

Thanks for letting me know how a real relationship should feels like.  

Falling in love is easy, what's hard is staying in love. 

Being with him was one of the best thing that happened in my life. 

"Shit happens in life and often times, we didn't choose for it to happen and there are just way too many things which are not within our control.

Falling in love isn't a choice, falling out isn't as well.

You can't control if you suddenly meet someone you think you'd spend the rest of your life with them and then realise after days, months or even years that he or she isn't the one for you.

Sometimes you just have to take a few risks, get hurt a couple of times, fall down and get back up just to know the right things to do."

- I fell in love with the way his smile forms. -